'What about the pact for democracy?' Reading between the lines

of a typical propaganda article published in the Jornal by Emanuel Janes 

During the last 38 years of (subverted) democracy  in Madeira, there have been various frustrated attempts of unifying the opposition to better combat the Jardinista governance, objective they could never achieve in isolation, as has been proved by successive elections which, ignoring these prophets of doom, have always handed Jardim absolute majorities.

The objective of this opposition, which unfortunately Madeira has (how unfortunate!), has always been to bad-mouth in an attempt to dethrone the PSD and its president, a man who gave his all for his land (like Kim Il Sung, Hitler?), who sacrificed his life, his family (tears well up in my eyes) and his political career (no less), to defend Madeira from the attacks of the colonialists (!!!!), both the local and continental ones. Without him (the heaven-sent one), Madeira would continue to be a colonial district of  medieval land with 'half a dozen camels playing cards at the tables of the Golden Gate' (presumably a quote from the great leader).

We all know that the  political regime in Portugal and the autonomous regions is a democracy, with free and democratic elections (where parliamentary immunity protects PSD members from being prosecuted for totally subverting the elections)…  But the opposition parties, because they do not accept their electoral defeats, calls them into question…All this goes to show how embarrassing and devoid of ideas this opposition is. It makes one laugh (all the way to the bank, I'm sure), when really it should make us feel like crying!

Now, with their fertile imagination, they have drummed up a 'pact for democracy' which has the Regional Government and all its supports laughing their pants off. This pact gathers ALL the opposition parties in a singularly abnormal situation, where you find socialists, catholics, fascists, communists, anarchists, people with chips on their shoulders and morons, in a desperate attempt to defeat Dr. Ablerto João (let me lick his boots some more please) and the PSD. .. 

This childish and offensive drivel goes on like this till the end of the page.